things i can take care of all by myself.

pOtTy tRaInEd. to the lady "working" the bathroom at webster hall, a couple of things...first of all, i don't like public restrooms, the fact that i am in there is enough of a challenge and inconvenience for me without you standing there expecting a tip and causing me to feel guilt that i am not going to give you one. is it so much to ask that i simply be allowed to get in, pee, and get the hell back out as quickly as possible, without interruption, without added stress? second of all, what the hell is it with the candy? no, i do not want any. i don't know where it came from, i don't know where it's been, and i, as a pretty steadfast rule, do not mix candy and toilets. third of all, i don't need a middleman when it comes to my toilet paper and paper towels. actually i'd prefer if mine were the only hands that touched those two items, so get your grubby hands off of them, i'd rather not wipe myself with something you just touched. and, lastly, the reminder to flush? absolutely unnecessary. i'm pretty sure flushing is covered in going to the bathroom 101.